The lifeline in a private hell

and, as John Ross discovers, one

woman has done her best to make

these women realise they are not alone.

COLEEN MacKenzie wishes someone like her had been around when she

needed help. The mother-of-two suffered post natal depression after the

birth of both her children, now aged nine and five. Hundreds of others

were sharing the same nightmare at the same time, all feeling isolated

and alone. And that experience has driven her and a team of volunteers

to try to ensure no one needs to endure that kind of desperation today.

Next month she marks the first anniversary of the setting up of the

first, and still only, MAMA (Meet a Mum Association) Matters centre in

Scotland offering support and information to mums suffering from post

natal depression.

The centre in Inverness, which also runs a creche, classes and courses

and a 24-hour helpline, manages to exist without core funding with

running costs being met by fundraising and donations.

Coleen, 32, who had previously run a playgroup and was involved in a

Gingerbread centre, first came into contact with MAMA Matters, at a

conference in Edinburgh while she was chairing an Inverness-based

support group for mothers and realised the service needed to be

extended.

At the time MAMA, the national body with Esther Rantzen as president

and Dr Miriam Stoppard as patron, ran 80 groups in England but none in

Scotland where only small pockets of help were available in the larger

population areas.

She gathered together a collection of volunteers -- nurses and other

mothers, some of whom had recovered from post natal depression -- to

train as ''befrienders'' to visit sufferers or just spend time with them

on the phone. At the same time efforts were being made to set up

self-help groups around Scotland.

The need for the service became evident during a trial period when the

group was inundated with calls from Stornoway to Edinburgh. ''It just

snowballed from there,'' said Coleen, now Scottish co-ordinator and

vice-chair of MAMA nationally. ''We were being flooded with calls from

people who would just say 'I don't know what to do. I need someone to

talk to.'

''They just need some comfort and to be told they are not alone. There

is still a stigma attached to post natal depression -- it is seen as an

old fashioned problem. The normal response is to be told to pull

yourself together and it will soon pass.

''It can hit you in lots of different ways from just feeling low to a

real psychosis. We are trying to ensure people know help is there,

sometimes it can just take a phone call. But it can be a daunting task

asking for help although some are desperate to do so.''

She said the problem is a common one which affects all age and social

groups.

''When you're pregnant it's a very exciting time. The family are all

there, you've got your ante natal classes and visits to the hospital and

everything. When the child is born there is a buzz of excitement -- the

family are around, your husband is probably on holiday, the midwife and

health visitor comes to visit.

''Then, all of a sudden your husband is back to work, the family are

no longer there, there are no more visits from the midwife and health

visitor, the excitement is over and its 'Oh God, what am I going to do?'

Suddenly your whole life has changed and no one has taught you how to be

a parent.''

With no regular funding the next difficulty was finding a base.

Inverness District Council provided six-month rent-free accommodation in

the Hilton Community Centre and now take care of the annual rent. To

furnish the premises Coleen undertook an Anneka Rice style challenge to

fit the place out in two weeks. She succeeded in persuading a host of

local companies to part with desks, chairs, filing cabinets, toys and

other materials for the creche and decorating materials. She spent a

total of #35 and collected #250 in donations.

It was the start of a series of on-going fundraising events ranging

from holding coffee mornings to dressing as Mr Blobby and rattling cans

in the pubs in order to keep the service going.

The Inverness office now has five staff in charge of a 60-strong

network of befrienders spread across the country from the Western Isles

to the Central Belt. The centre also now takes referrals from GPs and

health visitors.

''We are not trying to take over from the medical professionals,''

says Coleen. ''We are complementing what is done within the health

service.''

In just one month this year they dealt with calls for help from Fife,

Aberdeen, Banchory, Peterhead, Kingussie and Edinburgh as well as from

Inverness. Coleen says the feeling of isolation among sufferers is as

strong in inner cities, surrounded by people, as it is in the rural

Highlands and Islands.

''It doesn't matter where you are, whether its a house in the city or

a croft in the islands, you can still feel alone. I was living in

Edinburgh where I knew lots and lots of people but did not have a

'friend'. On both occasions I thought I was going mad.''

The search for more volunteers to act as befrienders or to set up

self-help groups to add to the network is continuous -- as is the battle

for funds. With a #600 electricity bill and #200 phone bill waiting, the

Blobby costume may get another airing soon.